On December 16, 2016, Cincinnati Children’s Hospital offered a press release regarding the hiring of Andrew Wooten as their new VP of its Center to Technology Commercialization. The original press release can be found here and is reprinted below for analysis.
When compared to other press releases, EffectCheck assesses this press release to be typical in evoked anxiety, slightly below typical in evoked hostility, depression, and compassion, and above typical in evoked confidence and happiness (see Figure 1).
Figure 1: EffectCheck score assessing Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Press Release.
Under the assumption that the press release would be improved if it offered less evoked anxiety and more evoked confidence, compassion, and happiness, some changes can be made as follows:
1) “is so critical” to “is so important”
2) “Andrew has spent much of his career at the intersection” to “Much of Andrew’s career has come at the intersection”
3) “to take our commercialization” to “to bring our commercialization”
4) “I look forward to working with” to “I look forward to joining with”
5) Add a concluding sentence about Cincinnati Children’s Hospital such as “At Cincinnati Children’s, we’ve given hope to children and their families for over 130 years. Contact us at 513-636-4200.”
With these changes, the EffectCheck profile for this press release now appears as:
which evidences lower anxiety (and also lower hostility and depression) and higher evoked confidence and compassion. Evoked happiness remains the same, but is already above typical for press releases.